Sports analogies are used quite often. Personally, I have never used one, because though I enjoy watching (not playing) some sports, I felt this one works. I am not a baseball player, though making a few million every time I went to work would really be helpful. But, to be honest, I am in a slump. The definition is made for me. I am not performing up to my expectations, or anyones I would imagine, And I am definitely in a drought. My game is off. A dry spell fits the bill.
An extended period when player or team is not performing well or up to expectations. A dry spell or drought.
Maybe one could call it a self-imposed slump. I get messages. I get offers, though some should be called solicitations. Take this gentlemen, and I use that term loosely. Again, a man one year younger than I am, so the category is my age group. Nondescript in the looks department, average, looks like an insurance salesman. ( now don’t go taking offense all of you insurance salesman out there. I could have said accountant, or computer geek.) He sends me a message and I respond with a friendly reply. Does he ask me to meet for a drink or a cup of coffee? Not a chance.
“Are you working?”, he askes me.
I responded and said , “Yes I am. All day.”
Then he says, Oh too bad. I thought I would come over and play.”
I respond with, “so let me get this straight. We had 3 lines of messages. Never talked. Never met. And you want to come over and play? I am not in the habit of having strange men whom I have never met come over to my home for sex.” Move on.
And may I add he was insulted and wanted to know what would be wrong with that? I should have asked him if he ever watches CSI or Law and Order.
So my slump continues. I get quite a few, So and So want to meet You” notifications. Do I want to meet them? NO. I cant agree to meet someone who looks like he lives in his mother’s basement. Or if he is holding a fish. Even a few messages that ask to meet. But I am not in the group of women, or men, I imagine, that will meet anyone for a drink or coffee, just to have another date. I do know women who do this. Many tell me they are not attracted to him, but hell why not grab a drink anyway, and then tell him no for next time. I would rather stay home. I have to be attracted visually or even, mentally, to want to got to the next step. I would not enjoy sitting there for even an hour, knowing I am only doing it to go out. Personal preference on my part.
A hitter can’t let a poor performance carry over into the next opportunity. Pouting or feeling sorry for yourself when you’re in a slump can become a habit, starting a vicious cycle that’s very hard to break.
I am definitely carrying over my slump attitude into other aspects of dating and even my life. Of course I am having a pity party. I detect a pattern, a habit as stated above. But habits are hard to break. I’m working on it. Baseball players practice their swings in the mirror, according to what I have read about being in a slump. I dont know what I can practice in the mirror. I guess I could practice saying, ‘yes’, or ‘don’t be a dating a snob,’ but I am not fooling anyone especially myself. I think it is more my attitude I have to change to eliminate the slump I am in. Or maybe a new dating site.