Tag Archives: dating online


I was hacked. My dating profile on Plenty of Fish was hacked. I am now a blonde,  almost 30 years younger. But I  am getting ahead of myself. I always said, in my next life , I will come back as a 6 foot blonde, but since this one is fairly short, and I  am not ready for my next life quite yet, I am officially pissed off.

At 5:30 in the morning, I received a message on the dating site through my phone app. Too early for me to worry about responding to any message. Back to sleep I go.  A minute or so later, I received another. Within a few minutes, I had 8 messages. Being me, I immediately got suspicious. Just the other night, I was saying that I hadn’t had a new message in quite a while on that site. Hmmm. I thought, wow, someone must have stuck a naked picture on my profile. Am I psychic? No just seem to have trust issues.

By the 10th message, before 6 AM , I grabbed my phone and clicked on the POF app. It asked for my password. Odd , I thought, it always opens right up.  So I entered my password, and it tells me it does not match. I have had this password for a year or so. After a few tries, I clicked on reset my password, so I entered my email. “That email,” it says, does not exist in our database. “ Now I am annoyed and a little disturbed.

Had to leave for work, so when I got to my office I tried it on my desktop, and got the same results.

On the POF site, I am looking for the little link that says CONTACT US. There isn’t one! There is a HELP section, so I go into that and nothing fits for what has taken place with my profile. They let you know how to change your password, how to edit your profile, but nothing about contacting them.

So now I have to google customer service for POF.  To me, that was a bad sign. I find a page with a phone # and an email. Try the phone #, and I hear “ THIS MAILBOX IS FULL.” Again, not a good sign.

Yes, now I am pissed off even more.

I email the customer care address and over a day later, I have had no response. I know you are as shocked as I am. Yeah right.

I can get into the search part of POF. Go to username search, enter my , or what used to be my, user name. It  pops up and suddenly I am a 34-year-old thin blonde woman. For the record, I am not.

So it has my age, my city, my profession, and 4 pictures of a blonde woman. One of which she is wearing a low-cut, short  lace dress, in pink. Pink is not my good color.  Now the mystery is cleared up as to why I received numerous messages within minutes this morning!

Everything that I had written in my profile was there, except the part that  says, “I am 34 , don’t know why it has the wrong age.” (well I know why )  It did go on about what she likes etc. Nothing bad, just generic.

But left all my other stats.

I also googled “ my profile was hacked on POF.” A few surprises there too! POF was hacked a few years ago. And yes, basically, nothing was done. Clearly, this has happened before.  There was an article that stated that POF has virtually no security on the site. That the passwords of users on the site was written in plain text, so hackers can have a field day. Take a look.


There were some forums where people asked the same question that I am dealing with, and was told to wait for the dating site to contact them. My guess, 3 years later, they are still waiting.

I finally realized there is nothing to do but wait to hear from POF. Not too optimistic about that. And, I have not created another profile on POF.

Lost in Translation

Here is a conversation that took place with someone I actually had gone out with a few times. We had a decent time together. Good conversation, a bit boring at times, but enough where we went out more than once. We met for a drink a couple of times and then this phone call.

He: “Would you like to go out? “

Me: “Sure. When and what did you have in mind?”

He: “ Oh i dont know . I can come over.”

Me: “I thought you meant go out.”

He: “Oh we can just watch a movie at your place.”

Translation: I want to come over and we will have sex.

Second attempt, about a week later

He: “Well, what are you doing this weekend? Lets get together.”

Me: “What did you want to do ?”

He. “Hmmm maybe I can come over.”

Translation: I want to come over and we will have sex

Third attempt. a few weeks later

He:” I cant wait to see you. ”

Me: “Actually, I am not feeling well. I think I am getting a cold.”

He: “Oh you don’t feel well? Don’t worry I can take care of you”. “wink wink.”

Translation: I can come over and we will have sex.

Few days later

He: “I thought I would come over.”

Me: “Well I dont know. Lets go do something.”

He: “ Oh come on. Havent seen you in weeks.”

Me: “Lets meet up somewhere.”

He: “Oh , do you have wine?”

Translation: I could always come over and we can have sex.

He: “But if you dont , that is ok.”

Translation: We don’t need wine to have sex.

There are times persistence pays off. Then there are the times where it does not.


Below are messages I have received on various dating sites. This is the first installment since the list continues to grow. Each from a different man, though apparently they all have the same manual with limited lines. Rest easy knowing I did not respond to these, because no one could take them seriously. Though, I have considered making sure people now call me Queen or Damsel.

And it begins:

1. Good evening to you, Damsel. How was your day? Reading your profile for the first time on OKcupid so much made my day and sparkles my interest in you a lot.

You seems incredibly special to me and i will really like to get to know you better.

Anyway, Can i write you to your personal email inbox telling you more about myself?

Best wishes,


2. If someone would ask me what a beautiful life means, I would lean my head on your shoulder, hold you close to me and answer with a smile, “Like this.You are very nice looking woman and i will like to know more about you..I hope to hear from you soon.You can txt me on 1 (XXX) XXX-XXXX or XXXX…@yahoo.com .I will send you my pictures if you want to see them..

3. Hello, my charming angel , ma james and i really admire your beauty a lot and with that am hoping to get to know you more, since i just join this very site, hoping to hear from you again , thanks

4. subject: A note from DXXXX

You are beautiful and I would to know more of you…I’m new on here and Looking to make new friends and find that one man woman who will love me for who I am,You can mail me or text me your number and let have a chat XXXXX@yahoo.com….XXX-XXX-XXXX

5. You are beautiful and I would to know more of you…I’m new on here and Looking to make new friends and find that one man woman who will love me for who I’m….XXXXXX@yahoo.com….xxx-xxx-xxxx

6. Hey Queen

What can i say now than WOW…… What a beautiful woman with a beautiful profile. i don’t think i remember how to introduce myself to a queen like you. I think i must start by saying Hi, I am XXXXX. i am new to this site but luckily i came across your profile and damn…. it made my heart skipped, i just have to click on the message button and say Hey Queen, you are the most beautiful lady i have ever seen.

Would you mind sending me an email to my personal email cos i don’t come here often so just email me directly to my personal email address… XXXX@Yahoo.Com

I can’t wait to hear from you.

7. Hi Pretty,

How are you today? I truly like your prospect of values and character. I’m looking for my soul mate, my one true love, A lady who is honest and sincere. Someone who is seeking for a true and a serious relationship. Life can get too complicated, Make good decisions. When you find someone special don’t screw it up, you may not get a second chance. Time passes so quickly and you never know what God has in store for you tomorrow. Cherish each day and person in your life as it would be the last day or last time you see them. Love have no place on earth – it’s just two people that can decide where earth and love is,I would be so happy if we can communicate and get to know each other better and see where our lives could take us .I appreciate every minutes that I spent going through your profile. xxxx

Honestly I Never Lie…… Really

One evening I was on the site when I recieved a message from someone,  who seemed to  be a  handsome looking man in his fifties.  We chatted and he said he wanted to learn about me.  I gave him some minimal information,  without revealing too much. Then, after a bit he said do you have a yahoo address? I have had this before- they seem to want to move off the dating site to chat- either the IM on the site is “too slow”, or he is having trouble on the site. These are reasons I have heard before , so immediately I am suspicious. He tells me he is in the army. Oh, I said, what do you do? He says “I am on a peacekeeping mission”, (which, to me,  is an odd way of saying what you do and where you are) so I  ask, are you in Afghanistan? He says yes, Kabul. I will be home in 3 months- this is my last mission. So after a bit, I gave him my yahoo email and he sent me a few  pictures- one in fatigues, one in front of  a helicopter, and one lounging on a chair in civilian clothes.  He tells me his rank and that he has 37 men under his command. Now he gives me his name, Roy James. (Just to note, I do not use names in this but , since I am sure it is not his name, and is very relevant to the story, I am putting it here.)  Now, he asks if we can get on yahoo messenger video. Wouldn’t normally agree,  but this way I could confirm a few things, because woman’s intuition was kicking in. We went on yahoo messenger and I immediately say, you look very different than your picture. He says  oh yes, my men told me I have put on a few pounds. I am thinking, well I don’t know if the problem is that you have gained weight, because I haven’t ever  seen you, but he definitely wasn’t looking too much like the pictures he had just sent me. I think to myself, why not send something current? So now my senses are really kicking in and I decide to cut the conversation short and say I have to go.  

The next day I get on the site and someone else  IM’s me. This one has no picture, but I begin chatting anyway.  Where do you live I ask- his profile said New Jersey. He said I am away from home. I am on a peacekeeping (his word) mission . I am in the army. Sound familiar? Where I ask- Kabul, he says.  But, he adds, I am going to be home in in 3 weeks- this is my last mission. Remember bachelor #1, was 3 more months.  I ask what is your rank, and yes, it was the same as bachelor #1, but his job was just a bit different. Then,  here we go, do you have a yahoo address? Why? I ask.  I am having trouble downloading my pictures, he says.  OK that was a new one I  hadn’t heard yet. I do give him my address because now I want to see his pics, because there is an alarm going off in my head. He says his name is Alex James. hmmmm , seeing a pattern? Yep same last name,  Maybe you have guessed it….. it was the same man in  the pics from bachelor # 1, but different shots. One was on a carrier, one was with another man at a party, and one was by a house.  I nearly choked!  I said, hold on- and told him I was chatting with someone the day before and he sent me pics of the same man. What, he screams, in email language, someone is using my pictures?? I reply that I really have no idea what is going on but I will find out. He says, give me his email address. Yeah right! No, I think I will handle this myself I say and scurry off yahoo.

The next day, day # 3, I get messages from ‘both’ gentlemen, each in a snit because “someone is using his pictures”. Separately, I email them and say,  both army, both in Kabul, last mission, home soon and same person in pics. Then I add, do not email me again, Well Roy , bachelor # 1, emails me anyway, and says who is using my pictures? how is that possible? I was brought up not to lie! REALLY? I did not respond at all. And then later on that day he sent an IM again and 2 days later a few  BUZZ messages on messenger though he has been deleted  from my contacts.  

Fast Forward, to another dating stie, Chemisty.com that I joined also. Guess who? Different name, different location, but it was definitely one of the “James boys”. Same guy, different poses. I also received a message on Chemistry from “Edward”, army fatigues, location-kabul, and yes a peacekeeping mission in Afghanistan. Different photo. I think there is  a gang called The Peacekeepers, infiltrating dating sites everywhere.


Just a quick update, I have had 3 more instances where I have received messages,  from 3 different men, different names and locations, all with the same man in the photo as both James boys. Busy busy man . Couldn’t resist so I wrote back and said you have tired this many times before on 3 different sites  with the same pics, different names. OOOPS. No response. Until next time.