Let Me Introduce You

 

Sometimes you just have to read it to believe it.

Hi dear,

I really don’t mean to invade your space, but I had to do this for the love and respect I have for my friend whose name is Howard, unfortunately he isn’t into online dating for some reasons best known to him. I’ve been telling him I would hook him up with someone nice, and when he came across your profile through my account earlier, and since then he’s been all over me about getting in touch with you, he said you seem like a woman whom has found balance in all ramifications of life which is a hard thing to come by these days. You can view him on my recent photos here, copy paste this URL: http://bit.ly/29R2WbS

He’s 6ft” tall, and falls between your age search criteria, he lives in the same state with you, but he’s just here for visit, he’s a good listener, good looking and all rounded a complete gentleman, I honestly did not tell him I was gonna contact you, but thought I took a chance, you never know until you try, it should be worth it in the end I’m so sure. So take a chance and e-mail him, you can share a picture and more information with him and I’m sure he’ll be so glad to do same so both of you can know each other better, and also tell him your handle on match, don’t be shy as I am very sure he would welcome your email 100%. His direct e-mail is: howard.rains147 (at) gmail (.) com

I hope you can decode that right? lol as the site wouldn’t let it go through directly. I had to private my profile now because I’ve found someone special so I’m leaving the site, and I want the same for my friend.

Stay happy

Vivian

I really don’t know where to start. Let’s start at the end.  VIVIAN? Sure. She Isn’t the first woman to send me a message on a dating site. But I have ignored those too.  She is only  helping her poor, helpless friend Howard find a mate.  Very supportive , very caring of Vivian.  I do  think she may want to use a different phrase then “hook up” her friend Howard with someone nice.  So when she says he saw my profile on her account, let’s ask ourselves, was she looking at me too or did he borrow hers to look at women? Probably doesn’t matter, because, yes, we know it is all BS. But let’s move on.

What could the reason be that Howard isn’t into online dating? And why is he keeping these secrets a mystery from his friend Vivian? If he is asking her to help him find his soul mate, he should open up and discuss his fear of online dating with her.

I would like to know what Howard saw in my sparse profile, to know that I have “ found balance in all ramifications of life”.  Maybe if he won’t share with Vivian , he would share his insight with me.

Wouldn’t you love to peek at what lies behind this mystery photo URL that Vivian has so generously shared with me.  I could just send her my social security number and my credit card numbers and save us all time.  Did you ever notice with these insane emails , the person always uses phrases like “gonna” and “wanna?” I imagine the general consensus is that Americans speak this way so it will sound genuine. A real down to earth scammer, I mean potential dating person.

I see Howard is a tall, good looking man, and miraculously lives in my state. Could a woman ask for more?  So what if he is just a bit skeptical about online dating. Can’t imagine why, with all of these honest, trustworthy people lurking behind profiles.  Wait.  Honest and trustworthy do not lurk. They patiently wait and butterflies land on their hands while they are waiting.  And Howard has the advantage of  Vivian standing by his side.

This message was on OK Cupid. Note the sentence where Vivian asks me to tell Howard “my handle on match.”  Vivian needs to watch her copying and pasting.  Always double-check for inconsistencies and change the information to fit the site. I should email her back and tell her to be careful of these small little things that mean so much to finding Howard’s future soul mate,

And finally, let us all rejoice in Vivian’s happiness that she has found someone and will be getting off of the site and is only looking for that for her dear friend Howard.  Good thing I was able to call various government agencies and “decode” Howard’s email.

 

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