Monthly Archives: October 2014

Changed My Mind

Your confidence builds. You are feeling good about yourself. Thinking, I am looking pretty good these days and you have a good feeling all around.  You even think it is safe to enter the dating scene. So you accept a date.

One Tuesday I received a pleasant message. Spoke about our common interests and background.  Thought he was a bit stiff, didn’t seem to have a light attitude or joke much, but I thought, ok, this is online. Chill out, give him a break.  We set up to meet the following Tuesday, though he did ask at first if I was free the next evening, Wednesday night. “Sorry,” I said,  “but I  have plans.” ( I really did.)

We talked on the site for a few days, and one evening wrote that he was looking forward to meeting. I concurred and said it will be fun. He  said he was going to NY to see his mom over the weekend. ( I had to assume he was telling the truth, I try not to be cynical every time)  Very briefly on the friday of that weekend we spoke and then ended with we will chat before Tuesday.

Monday comes and no word. Yep, my wonderful, reliable gut was kicking in again. I did not have a good feeling about this.  I sent him a message on the dating site and said “hi. just wanted to be sure we were still meeting up on tuesday.” I don’t feel comfortable having a plan for a week and not have confirmation.  Nothing. The next morning, which was the Tuesday of our “date”, he sends me a message that says, “I’m very sorry, but I’ve decided not to meet. Best of luck in your search for love, peace and happiness.”

I was so annoyed.  I wrote back and said “Wow nice of you to let me know before today.”

I didn’t ask why, though I really wanted to know the reasoning behind it. So many to choose from. He simply changed his mind, Maybe he met someone else and wanted to focus on her. Maybe he is simply a jerk.  I admit, he tried to write it nicely, but it was not sitting well. I was insulted that he changed his mind. I do think it is merely frustration and /or annoyance that no matter what, I can’t seem to meet someone for a mere drink!

This guy was even in my age group. If nothing else I am giving myself points for that!  He is in my decade! Could be a first. I have gone out with some very close to my decade, just short a few years. But I have realized that same decade or not, it doesn’t matter.

Sometimes you can read an article and think,  “Do they know me? Did they peek into my dating world and get some ideas? This one is about being single and frustrated. How timely! I will take a wild guess and say I am not the only one, male or female, who at times, feel this way.  I have had toxic relationships. Do I repeat the pattern? Do I pick the wrong men?  I think, unless your dating life is perfect, one of these may hit home for you, If not,  consider yourself lucky and not single and frustrated.

http://www.eharmony.com/dating-advice/about-you/single-and-frustrated-5-things-to-consider/?lcid=102210&laid=Links#.VEbjuxZYrZB

Feed Me A Line

Writing is not everyone’s forte. Simple lines and simple words sometimes get a message across just as easily as flowing prose or poetry.  Do cheesy lines work?

One guy actually wrote to me and said, “Did you hurt yourself when you fell from heaven?”  I thought that was just in the movies.  No. he was not joking. Sad, I know.  But if you are going to try for a line, or some phrase that may catch my eye, make it good. Check a dictionary or Google the phrase.

Read on for another installment following a  few of my previous posts, such as, Uh What Did you Say, Would You Repeat That, Parts 1-3. and  Let Me Read From You, and Other Assorted Phrases

I’m a honest, loving, bubbling man. ( so many thoughts go through my head on this one. I think Tums could help that problem. )

Good day to you, Damsel. How was your day? Reading your profile for the first time on the site so much got me intrigued and sparkles my interest a lot (I love sparkly things) sparkles

My name is William Talking about my self, I love friends and family,. (I wonder who else he could possibly be talking about.) myself

every time I look at your picture I wonder what it would have been like to make love to you for hours and hours . ( keep wondering. keep dreaming)

Beautiful is supposed to be a word that describes someone or something. Now that I met you I realize that beautiful is more than just a word. Beautiful speaks, beautiful talks, beautiful is sexy, beautiful breathes, and beautiful smiles. Beautiful is you. (must be lyrics from a song somewhere in time)beautiful

Its been very terrible searching on this site beside I’m new to this internet dating stuffs, I was introduced by a friend who recently got married and relocated to Canada. That’s why I’m giving this a try. ( let’s see, is it terrible because he is new? or did his friend just make him feel bad? Does he want to relocate ?  Pack your bags, Ms. Right!)

am captivated in you as well as your profile and i would like to hit the books to know more about you ( maybe the books can give him some better lines)books

I really admire your beauty and cute smile. I must say every single man will love to go out with you but for me I will first love to be friends with you and see where it will lead us.. What do you think? (I  have friends.  Little does he know,  married men want to go out with me too)

How are you doing today and how is your weather over there ? I’ve been trying to find some old friends, i would like to ask you LOL (old friends?  does he know I am not his old friend? on a dating site? My weather. Covered all the social media and the weather channel in one motion)

I love to drink martini Not from a glass but all other source sets of both lips etc.  How are you? I hope we can talk. U seem a nice lady (I am a nice lady. That is why I never responded to your inappropriate lines. and these lips will never meet yours)

Hi Pretty,nice profile,checking around the dating network and your profile gave me an attention, ( I love when my profile gives attention, though I am not sure what kind of attention we are talking about)

How are you this sweet lovely day.. i got up from bed to take a glass of chilled water and was going through the site when i skimmed across your profile…sorry if i am intruding your privacy but i have to confess that you have a wonderful and charming smile that kept me staring at your page… (who gets up for a glass of water, chilled or not,  and stops at his or her laptop to check on profiles on the way to the kitchen?)water

am very active and cheerful. I like positive people and a good sense of humor. As a real man I am emotional and sensual. My friends love being in my company and talk to me by hours. ( good thing he is a real man. I hate when robots message me)robot

Everybody makes mistakes and I usually give people the benefit of the doubt, but if the same pattern keeps emerging, it’s over I do not want to meet someone who may think that they will take advantage of me or lie to me and cheat on me under false pretenses. Sorry if that sounds harsh, and I’m not accusing you of any wrongdoing, but I’m being upfront and honest about that. So you know where I stand from the beginning. With all due respect as well, I hope that you are upfront and honest with me, as well. ( I am so glad I am getting a pardon from someone I never messaged or communicated with in any way)

I’m just asking you to keep it real and be honest from the beginning; that way, nobody is wasting their time or getting their feelings hurt also realize that at times two people are just too different to be in a relationship together; it doesn’t mean that it’s anybody’s fault, it’s just that they’re too different to be compatible. Was really nice written you, will be very glad if you can also write to me much and more about yourself at this manner as i wrote to you. Well hope to hear from you soon. Kisses  (keep your kisses. I don’t want them. And if I write to you in the same manner as you wrote to me, you wont know what I am saying either. So lets forget you ever messaged me.)

my name is mark i am new here just checking out some profile but yours caught my eyes, I’d like to correspond with you,if you don’t mind, to know what we have with you,if you don’t mind, ( well , Mark. Here is the deal.  I am very proud I caught both of your eyes, and not just the usual one at a time. Work on your pronouns too)

I want to meet a woman that is tolerance level ( he should know I have no tolerance level) and how far he can go in life ( we can fill in any words that may actually complete this sentence. It will be a form of Mad Libs), if he is willing to stick around when the going gets tough and he will be there for me and I will be there for her too when the going gets tough on us. If she will still love me when I am falling apart.( again PRONOUNS !  He. She. It. They. Repeat after me.) pronouns

I like your inspiring smile on your picture ,just gone through your profile and it a great deal meeting you,you really have my interest and I can’t pass with out saying Hi, you’ve got a very nice profile and it impressive,you sounds very cool, adorable,sensitive,serious and an open minded person and I will really love to meet you in person, you’ve got a very great personality with the qualities of a good woman and I’m very much interested of getting to know the deeper side of you, so if you’re interested get back to me urgent. ( guess I’d better hurry) urgent

Well am on here looking for Happiness in Long-Term from this life ( as opposed to your past life?)

How are you doing this blessed day. I really hope everything is good.. A friend of mine introduced me to this wonderful dating site and I’m very thankful to be on here. By the I’m Tony and I guess I’m new on here.. If I must confess, I really admire your smiles ( poor thing doesn’t know for sure if he is new  on here or not.  and really, I only own one smile) smiles

Am new to this place but couldn’t help myself with your beautiful smile, Am breaking out my shy shells to let you know you captured my attention and I enjoyed everything I read on your profile. ( what is a shy shell and how does one break it out? )shy

and one of my favorites-

“Wow dear” what an Surprise, honesty I must Say you have a very lovely and Beautiful simile, from a pretty face, Dear I apologize” Which I’II could be friends.

            I think we need a translator for this one.

One Swipe Says It All

I am not sure I get the whole “like you” button on OKC. Though, I think I get the concept. All the dating sites seem to have a similar feature. Match.com has a favorite button and a like button. OKC has the “he likes you” button., Sort of like Tinder does , but with a little more information. and a little more effort than a swipe. It seems to be a good starting point. Hey I like you. Maybe you will like me.  Brings me back to 6th grade, where a boy likes you, tells his friend, who then tells your friend, who then tells  you that Johnny likes you, you giggle together and exclaim how cute he is, and nothing ever happens.

like

I receive  a “He Likes You” message from a member. I look at  his profile, then decide if I will like him back.  What now?  If I check it out and he seems appealing in some ways, I may hit the ‘I like you button’ as well. Here we go . We are matched up both liking one another. Then what? I have done just that . I have let him know that I too am interested.  And nothing. No follow up from him. No message. No interaction. I have also tried, if  he has “liked me” , to send a message to him.  No problem making the first move. So I write a quick message.  Do I expect a response? Yes I do. You went through the effort of looking at my profile, and  hitting ‘Like you.’ Here is my main question. You liked me, I am sending you a message, why would you not respond? Did you change your mind? Did you hit the wrong button?  Is that a feature similar to Facebook? Where you like a comment or a photo and no one expects anything after that?

My assumption is, it is a feature to help match you up with someone. He has informed me that he likes me, so therefore I would assume, (never a good idea) that he would want further contact. match

In reality, he is just letting me know and moves on.  Is it a shyness factor?  Or another  one for his plus column? I just want to let you know I like you, but I am not willing to do anything about it.

I guess Tinder comes into play again. I have matched a number of guys on there, and nothing. No message to me and no response, whether I decide to send one first, or wait for him to make the first contact. Maybe they are keeping score of how  many matches they can get. Tinder I take with a grain of salt anyway. I get the concept, but do you really want to meet someone who doesn’t even put a photo on there? That is all you are going by in the first place. One needs a starting point, don’t they?

And, by the way,  there have been times on Tinder, where I would forget, think I am swiping to look at another picture and I hit the nope or Like feature instead! Ooops. Meant to say I like you  but I hit NOPE by mistake. I am sure  he will come up in another round-up! Of course, accidentally hitting I like you , when you meant to hit NOPE, is worse. Then they may match. And back on the photo topic on Tinder, why does any guy think I, or anyone, would hit LIKE if he has no picture, no information about himself and who is to say even the age is correct?  That is a risk I am not willing to Swipe!